What Is Play Therapy, and How Can It Help My Child?
Parents often come to therapy hoping their child will sit down, talk about what is wrong, and learn a few coping skills to help them feel better. The problem is that many children cannot talk through their experiences in the same way adults can. Honestly, even many adults struggle to explain why they feel or behave a certain way.
Children need more than someone asking them questions or telling them which coping skill to use. They need the chance to actually experience the emotion, work through it, and figure out, “Okay, what do I do with this feeling now?”. That is where play therapy comes in.
Play Is the Natural Language of Children
Adults often process their experiences by talking about them. Children naturally process their experiences through play.
Children live in the here and now of their emotions. Instead of sitting across from a therapist and explaining everything that has happened to them, they show what they are experiencing through the way they play. Play gives children an opportunity to communicate and begin making sense of their life without depending entirely on words.
Children Learn Regulation Through Experience
A child may build a tower in the playroom only to have it fall over again and again. Eventually, the child becomes frustrated. Instead of immediately fixing the tower or telling the child to calm down, I give them the time, space, and opportunity to experience that frustration.
I may name what is happening and help the child recognize the emotion. From there, the child can begin figuring out: “ How do I get unstuck instead of staying here?”
That is how regulation begins to develop.
The Relationship Is What Creates Change
Play therapy is not therapeutic simply because toys are in the room. The relationship between the child and therapist is at the center of change.
A parent may see me sitting with their child and tracking their behavior as they put together a train set. It may look simple, but I am creating a safe environment that communicates:
I am here, I hear you, I understand, I care, and I delight in you.
Children naturally move towards their best selves when they feel unconditionally accepted for who they are
How Will I Know Play Therapy Is Helping My Child?
Parents often wonder how they will know whether play therapy is making a difference. The changes may begin showing up in the everyday moments that once felt difficult.
Your child may recover from big emotions more quickly. Mornings may feel smoother. Power struggles may happen less often. Your child may begin speaking about themselves with more confidence, focusing more easily, or receiving fewer notes home from school.
You may notice:
More emotional regulation
Less self-deprecating talk
Increased focus
Fewer concerns at school
Fewer power struggles
Easier mornings
Every child’s progress looks different, but over time, you may begin to see your child feeling happier, more confident, and more capable of moving through difficult emotions without staying stuck in them. And when your child begins feeling better, things often begin feeling better for your family too.
Common References:
Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley.
VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press.
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781315537948
