What My Sick Dog Taught Me About Trusting the Play Therapy Process

Recently, my dog was sick with pretty intense stomach issues. And it felt like it was never. going. to. end.

After what felt like the millionth time cleaning up another accident, I remember asking my husband, “What if she’s just stuck like this?!” (Which, looking back, was obviously a little dramatic).

She had been to the vet. She was taking medication. We were doing everything we were supposed to do! My husband kept reminding me, “The vet said she’s going to get better. We just have to give it time.”

But when you’re the one cleaning up the mess every day, time feels like a very unsatisfying answer.

I wanted to know she was getting better now.

And honestly, that experience made me think about what child therapy can sometimes feel like for parents.

“But is it actually working?”

When your child is struggling, you’re living with it every day. You’re navigating the meltdowns, the arguing, the school notes, the bedtime battles. All of the behaviors you thought would have gotten better by now.

So after your child has been in therapy for a few weeks, it makes complete sense to start wondering:

Is this working?

Shouldn't we be seeing more progress?

What if they're stuck like this?

Is there anything we can do to make this go faster?

And this can be especially confusing with play therapy because sometimes the work happening in the playroom doesn't look like what adults expect therapy to look like.

Your child may not come home and tell you about the incredible emotional insight they had in session.

They might just tell you they played.

Sometimes change is happening before we can see it

With my dog, I couldn't see what was happening inside her body. I couldn't watch the medication work. I couldn't see her digestive system healing.

All I could see was...well...the accidents.

But eventually, what was happening internally started showing up externally.

Things became a little more normal.

Then a little more.

Until one day, I realized: Oh. She's better.

There wasn't one dramatic moment where everything changed. It was gradual.

And that's often what progress in play therapy looks like, too. Children are developing awareness, working through experiences, building emotional regulation, testing new ways of responding, and experiencing a relationship where they feel accepted and understood.

We don't always see those changes immediately on the outside.

Then little things start happening. Maybe the meltdown is still happening—but it lasts 15 minutes instead of 30. Maybe your child gets upset but recovers a little faster. Maybe they use their words in a moment when they normally would have screamed. Maybe their teacher notices something small. Maybe you realize a transition that used to be a battle wasn't one today.

Those little changes matter.

Progress doesn't have to be dramatic to be progress

Of course, trusting the process doesn't mean ignoring concerns or blindly continuing something that isn't helping. Parents should absolutely be able to ask questions, talk with their child's therapist about what they're noticing, and regularly evaluate progress together. But it does mean remembering that meaningful change isn't always an overnight fix.

We have to give children the time and space to do the work before we can fully see the results of that work.

And as someone who very recently needed repeated reassurance that her dog would, in fact, eventually get back to normal...

I get it.

Waiting is hard when you're the one living through the messy part.

But little by little, things can change.

Trust the process. Notice the small wins. And give growth the time it needs. And remember: when your child says they “just played,” a whole lot more is happening underneath.